Today while I was sitting on the toilet, eating the last cupcake, and hiding from my children (in fear that they would find out that I was eating the last cupcake), I had a great awakening. THERE ARE SO MANY UNATTRACTIVE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD.
Now, I know what you the reader have by now realized that I am very self-consumed. But really.....you know how the government is creating a new governmental position for a car czar? I want to be a czar for the ugly.
What I find interesting is that most people are not ugly by nature. They just make really bad choices when it comes to combing their hair (or not), they wake up in the morning and make a cognisant decision to have low self-esteem (by the way they dress themselves). I would like to make my first declaration to the ugly as their czar. WAKE UP, GET A COMB, and USE IT!!!!
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But how can I follow your directives and still remain a member of the Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club, whose directive SPECIFICALLY states that I will uphold the honor and code by 'occasionally forgetting to wear deodorant, spending at least 60 percent of waking hours with lipstick on her teeth, adn abiding at all times to the fundamental Idiot Girls' Mission Statement: "It's not a girdle, it's a BODY SHAPER!"?
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